Life

It was foolish for me to think this, but I thought it anyway. I thought that for once, someone was on my side. I thought, with her help, I could convince everyone that this was right. But I was wrong. Even though she's still with me, there are circumstances beyond either of our control. And the person I thought would help me deal, isn't really helping. I know she's trying. She's being rational, which I know is right. She's doing all she can, and she's trying to help me. But, God, how I wish she could come up with a solution. I wish someone could.

I always thought that I was lucky. When things in my life got bad, I could leave, start over. I thought I was lucky that way. But now, the time when things are worst, when leaving seems the rational option- I can't go. I can't leave this person I love. She's keeping me here. And I don't know how to get through this. It seems no one is on my side. And yet, at this moment, she's here for me, helping me through. I live in this beautiful, horrible paradox, and I don't know how to escape, or if I even want to.

Things are so amazing one moment, but in the next, my whole world caves in again, each time worse than the time before. There are people in this world that disguise themselves. They pretend to be nice, they help you out and give you hope, but then they turn out to be someone else inside. Someone who wants to cause harm. It's impossible to identify these people until it's too late. They've already caused damage that cannot be undone.

I need a solution to a problem that cannot be solved. And I don't know what to do about it.